Flops

So sad when you make something that just doesn't turn out the way you want it to:( So we just got back from a delightful trip to France and of course I tried to recreate a bit of the magic here at home by having people over for dinner and crepes last night. Not having made crepes since I was but a teen, I consulted Alton Brown and smitten kitchen.com. I was surprised at the differences between them, not major really but I expected to see a the same standard proportions. See? They both call for two eggs but with significantly different amounts of flour. I went with Alton because I figured SK's more egg to flour ratio might be more omelette-y than crepe-y. Plus, I added 2 T. of sugar and a splash of vanilla. I have to say that they really didn't taste of sugar or vanilla, nor did I like the texture. It was thick, or maybe dense? And kind of chewy? Anyway, I guess I'll just have to keep practicing, which I'm fine with.


Alton Brown:

2 large eggs
3/4 cup milk
1/2 cup water
1 cup flour
3 tablespoons melted butter

SK

2 tablespoons butter, melted and cooled slightly
1/2 cup milk
2 large eggs
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
Two pinches of salt
Few gratings fresh nutmeg
2 tablespoons honey

I was also yearning for some hearty bread, seeded and rich with different textures. I found a recipe from the Harvard School of Public Health and I can't really fault them because I deviated from the recipe. But they say "There is no right and wrong when making this bread!" And I believed them. Anyway, here's what I did. First, I cut it because I just didn't need three loaves. Plus, I subbed some flours for others that I did not have. Finally, I made a sponge with the flour before adding the seeds and whatnot, unlike the recipe, which says to add flours last and no sponge. The sponge was going a-ok, growing rapidly and smelling deliciously yeasty. Then I added the seeds and it all went to shit. When I started kneading, I can't even explain it. I've never felt dough like that before. There was absolutely no stretch or pull to it, if that makes any sense. I did what I could on the kneading front and then let it rise into a pathetic little ball. I let it go for an hour, during which time it rose almost imperceptibly. Let it go a while longer and then put it in the refrigerator overnight. I didn't even have the heart to turn on the oven for that sad mess. There's only so much kitchen disappointment I can take in one day. I finally baked it, the cruel, hard-hearted knot that it was, but haven't yet tasted it. I'm hoping that, once toasted and gilded with butter, it will be somewhat edible but we'll see. What did I do wrong???


1 1/4 cups of warm water (110–115°F)
1 packets of dry active yeast (1/4 ounce each)
3/4 cup whole grain rye flour
1 1/3 cups whole wheat flour
2 grams of salt
Canola oil or canola oil spray, as needed
Seeds and Grains

1/3 cup of ground flax seeds (grind them in a coffee grinder, or buy milled flax seeds)
1/3 cup pepitas (pumpkin seeds)
1/4 cup whole rolled oats
1/4 cup wheat bran